#10 - On Faith, Hope and Love....

Even with a fatal diagnosis, I have faith.  After all, we all live with a fatal diagnosis...we just all come to the fatal parts differently, and on different timelines.  Faith is different things to different people. When we read of faith in the bible, it usually implies confidence, trust, reliance and humility.  The Merriam-Webster Dictionary definition is "strong belief or trust in someone or something; belief in the existence of God; strong religious feelings or beliefs; a system of religious beliefs.  What do I mean when I say I have faith?

First of all, I believe in God. I believe in Jesus Christ as His only son.  I pray...all the time.  More now than before my diagnosis.  But then, I have more time.  I have confidence that my prayers, along with anyone else's, are heard. I have trust that prayers make a difference.  I rely on my belief and my prayers to ease my burdens of fear, sadness, anger and loneliness.  And I am humbled by the blessings happening in my life, and that of my family during this journey.  I have strong beliefs - about God, about my life, my family, and friends - FAITH that this journey is not the end. 

About Hope.  I received the most amazing Valentine's gift this weekend - from an amazing young woman, named Hope.  I have known her mother for over 17 years.  Our children attended the same elementary school.  Hope was my student in 7th grade.  We have really gotten to know each other better since then.  She is a gifted athlete, a hard working college student, humble, charitable and beautiful from the inside out.  She brought me a basket full of bright primroses, and at least two dozen sealed envelopes "from people who love you dearly" (her words).  Strict instructions to only open one per day.  I am obeying the directive, thank goodness.  Each letter has required multiple tissues. I was speechless.  An incredible gift from a remarkable young woman, and every person that contributed.  It is the best way to start my day - morning medications, get dressed, pick a letter to read at breakfast. Each letter feels like a hug.  

This brings me to love,  ALS steals our lives, one part at a time. Steals ability to move, to speak, to eat, and eventually to even breathe.  But I am still me.  My heart still beats, my brain still functions, I still have feelings, physical and emotional.  I still love.  And still feel loved.  In fact, the love in my life has multiplied and been magnified.  The blessings...time to say things that should be said (in my iPad app's voice, "Heather"), time to listen to others. Listening more than talking (what a concept!)  It is easy to feel lonely with ALS, especially as it progresses.  Hard to get out, difficult to communicate. But our house is filled with love, all the time,  Cards, letters, visits, flowers, texts, emails, laughter, tears, hugs.  So appreciated, cherished and shared.  So much love.  I am blessed beyond measure.

Faith.  Hope.  Love.

Valentine's Day 2015
with Hope